There are only about 20 Sundays a year dedicated to the art of football watching. For the past two, we have been going to Union Jack's in Bethesda. Last week, it was pretty much everything you could have wanted in a bar (save for some shoddy service during the 4:00 games due to what one of the staff members admitted was their busiest day ever). At the very least, this bar was a pair of queens to Caddies' 2-7 offsuit. Today I arrived at my seat literally at the 1:00 kickoff. The J man and Ike already had their fries and drinks, so I did not expect anything to be amiss with our service. Much like last week, the bar was sparsely populated during the early games. Our waitress shows up to ask my drink order and give me a menu. At about 1:15 I ordered a George Burger, medium rare. I had just played a game of touch football on an empty stomach, so I was pretty hungry. Then I waited.
I should have known something was wrong when I overheard the waitress apologizing to the table next to us because she "totally forgot" their chicken tenders. But I wasn't too worried. It was only about 1:30. Even burgers can take a long time at a bar when everyone orders at the same time.
At about 1:45, it became clear that our waitress might actually have Down Syndrome. My burger was nowhere to be found even though just about everyone else in the place was eating. One waitress came over and asked if we were using our Ketchup. I said I'd trade it to her for a burger.
At 2:00, Ike called the waitress out on it. I believe the exact wording was "He ordered a burger 45 minutes ago and its not here yet." I basically wanted to kick her teeth in (which probably would have made her look better).
2:15 rolled around and we had to tell the manager that I ordered a burger an hour ago and it still wasn't there, despite telling our stupid waitress about it about 15 minutes ago.
Finally, around 2:30 I finally got my burger. The manager said it was free because of how rediculous it was that I had to wait that long. Also, our waitress was mysteriously moved to the other side of the restaurant. Now I was finally ready for my sweet, sweet lunch. But here is basically what I got:
Not only was the burger lukewarm, it was fucking RAW in the middle. By this time I was so pissed and hungry that I just ate it anyway. Now I'll probably get mad cow disease. Not only that, but when I looked for the lettuce, tomato, and onion that they give you on the side, I definitely got the worst possible tomato and onion. They both had an approximate diameter of half an inch and were about 1 millimeter thick.
This is the second time this season that we've had a terrible waitress at a sports bar. I don't get it.
