Thursday, May 25, 2006

Dag!

I'm conducting an experiment. I want to bring back "Dag!" Use it as a substitute for "damn" or "shit." Here's an example: say someone is late. "Dag! What took you so long?" Feel free to use it as much or as little as you would like. I just want to see it come back.

Onto the real post.

McDonald's has new desserts! Well, they're not really new, as much as they are just various combinations of their old desserts. The four new faces on the menu are: the Oreo sundae, the chocolate chip (cookie) sundae, the apple pie sundae, and the brownie sundae. Each consists of ice cream, the eponymous "solid" dessert item, hot fudge, whipped cream, and a cherry on top. Upon seeing this turn of events, I had to try one.

Girlfriend and I went to the notorious Adams Morgan Mickey D's and took our chances. For those who are in the know, Sipowicz was not working tonight. But that did not change my extremely low expectations about the quality of "service" there. I went in and ordered an Oreo McFlurry (for Girlfriend) and a Chocolate Chip Sundae without whipped cream for myself. I knew it was a bad omen when I had to point at the picture menu to explain my choice.

The girl who took my order told the manager about the choices and he showed her how to make the new dessert first. It started out fine with the cup, ice cream, and hot fudge, but then things took a turn for the expected. He went over to the crushed Oreos and put that on the sundae, then covered the top with whipped cream and a cherry. Of course, I knew this was "my" order and he was fucking it up, but I let him go all the way with it.

He proudly presented me with this bastardization of my order and I broke the bad news: "I wanted the CHOCOLATE CHIP sundae with NO WHIPPED CREAM." He gave me the stupid grin to show that he didn't understand and I resorted to broken english and picture pointing again. "The cookies (pointing to the picture). No whipped cream. That sundae (pointing again)... and an Oreo MCFLURRY" He finally got the idea.

He put the first sundae in the salad refrigerator. I'm not sure why and I don't want to know. Then he went to the back, got some cookies, put them in a cup, and added the ice cream and the hot fudge. Just when I thought things were going well, HE MADE THE MOVE FOR THE WHIPPED CREAM AGAIN! In my firmest tone, I said, "NO WHIPPED CREAM!" This time he finally took heed.

The truth is, I didn't want the cherry either, but I knew that would really throw him off and it would be easy enough to remove, so once he dropped it on the top, I happily accepted the sundae because it was as close to what I wanted as it was going to get. I then had to remind him about the McFlurry again and he actually made it correctly. After waaaaaaaaay too long in there, I had gotten what I came for.

The verdict: the Chocolate Chip Sundae is pretty damn good. The cookies were warm and gooey and you can't screw up the rest of the ingredients because they are all pre-made. I give it a solid 7 out of 10 Catheters. But it was not worth all of the aggravation of getting it. Either way, the same thing would probably cost $10 at Baskin Robbins, so you're going in up $7.50. If you have the patience of a saint, I recommend it.