Ramblings and Keywords

Its gotten to the point where I am ridiculously bored most days (except today, when I got to do the offseason in Madden). That's Madden 2004 because my 2005 does not work anymore for some reason, which sucks because it had the ever popular Madden Trivia. Great for pre-gaming. I also heard that Madden 2006 sucks big floppy donkey dick so I might not get it. Who am I kidding, I have to get it. Unfortunately, I have to get a job before that happens because I am dangerously close to tapping into my Bar Mitzvah Bonds (which I have no idea how to cash).

I'm setting the over/under on me getting a job at September 9th. I have a couple things in the hopper right now, but who knows. I am unemployable.

Asking only workman's wages
I come looking for a job
But I get no offers
Just a come-on from the whores on Seventh Avenue
I do declare, there were times when I was so lonesome
I took some comfort there

For those who are counting, its up to 131 applications. For those who are licking, its WBALLS. For everyone else, here are some Ramblings and Keywords. Enjoy.


-- I love when girls wear those oversized polo shirt dresses that make it look when they aren't wearing any pants. Especially when the girl is a petite blonde, wearing pink or white.

-- Why is every Chevy Cavalier teal?

-- I think its great that in just 10 years, we've gone from the "white" radio stations cutting the rap part out of Michael Jackson's song, "Black or White" to JC Penny using The Black Sheep's "The Choice is Yours" in their tv ads.

-- I hate Mo Rocca.

-- I don't remember whether I heard this somewhere or made it up. Regardless, its the best cut down ever: "You pancake-eating mogoloid! I hate you and your weird nipples!"

-- I just watched "The Office" for ths first time last night. Its great. Steve Carell is perfect as the douchebag middle management type.

-- Has anybody made more out of less than "The Miz" from the Real World? That guy has been on tv for the last 5 years for absolutely no reason. He'll probably take over Late Night when Conan leaves.

-- Why has Bravo all of a sudden gone from the gay channel to the Kathy Griffin channel?

-- At the wedding I was at recently, I saw something unprecedented: a suit jacket with a popped collar. I wanted to bludgeon the guy with a full bottle of Jack Daniel's.

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Some recent keywords people have used to get to my site...

Eazy-E Tattoo
I'm innocent bitch
George Benson Jehova Witness
Guy Hollerin Attorney
Half field soccer rules
Clint Eastwood Flags of our Fathers Rumsfeld
Minding the store "i don't know how to make drinks.... i know how to make coke."
Want to be a bonesman
Vagina gaff
Karaoke Peyote Cafe

I get a lot of hits from "LSU Thunderstruck Video." There must be a kickass video out there.