100th Time's a Charm?

I just applied to my 100th job in the last year or so. How do I know? I have been keeping a list so that when people (read: my mother) claim that I haven't been trying, I can point to my list and say, "actually, I'm up to job #100." The sad part is that for probably at least 75 of the jobs, I have either been qualified or overqualified and still no bites.

What I want to know is that if the jews really control the media (and the law, and sports, and comedy) and we only compose something like 2% of the population, then why can't I get a job in any of those fields? I'm a jew. There have to be old jews dying every day that are leaving jobs open for the next generation. I want to reiterate: I am willing to start at the bottom and stay there.

I also want to know if the jewish mafia is still out there. You know, Ben (don't call me Bugsy) Siegel, Meyer Lansky, and the like. I like the Sopranos. I'd be willing to run numbers or something similarly old timey like that. Plus, I think that living in Vegas would do wonders for my skin.

For your reading pleasure, here is the description of one job I applied for today. They actually replied to me and said that although my credentials were impressive, they could not consider me because I don't currently live in LA. I just wanted to find out who the person is. Any guesses?

Company: Confidential
Title: Celebrity Executive Assistant
This is a FULL TIME JOB
Location: Los Angeles CA
Date Posted: 5/25/2005 5:04:40 PM

Description: High profile music celebrity seeks executive assistant to handle business affairs - will liaison with music managers, attys, business management personnel and publicists - will be working out of two LA locations and must be free to travel and have strong experience preferable in music if not for another high profile entertainment personality

Requirements: Must be able to take direction, be available 24/7 and must be assertive yet know your place - be a strong gatekeeper, must get along with longterm personal assistant who will be traveling as part of entourage. Must be calm, be a resourceful problem solver and be able to work in a team environment. Ensure artist's life remains calm and easy, the words ''not in my job description'' shoudl not be part of your vocabulary and know this is a lifestyle choice of position as your world will revolve around employer

Salary: 80 - 100K

I would totally be someone's bitch for that kind of scratch. It would beat wearing a suit to work.