Ramblings II

Since my first installment of Ramblings was so popular, I decided to bring it back for a little something I like to call: Ramblings II. Enjoy.

--Why does the crotch of my jeans wear out way before the rest of the jeans do? Maybe it has something to do with the fact that they get washed maybe 4 times every six months. Or maybe they just can't handle the weight of my junk. The world may never know.

--If I ever get enough money to buy a house, the first upgrade I'm going to make is to install a laundry room. Not just a washer and dryer. I'm talking at least 3 washers and 2 dryers. I'm much too lazy to do my laundry in innings.

--The only thing that makes the nearly insufferable waiting time (caused by 2 or more people trying to check out at once) at CVS manageable is their awesome soundtrack. Yes, I like easy listening music. You wanna fight about it?

--If a retarded person plays golf, how do you ask them what their handicap is?

--I don't think its humanly possible to eat chips and salsa without getting one drop on your clothes.

--Why is it that the people who are the most outwardly religious (aka bible-thumpers) are always the biggest liars, theifs, and cheats?

--Why do people stop right before they get on escalators so that they can time their grand entrance? They give you about a 6 foot buffer zone that is flat, moron. Its not like you're playing Frogger.

--When did we officially stop having jungles and start having rain forests?

--As far as I'm concerned, the Monday after we "spring forward" 1 hour should be a national holiday. You wind up staying up an hour later than normal on Saturday night because of the time change and then you are all messed up on Sunday, which leads to trying to rectify the situation Monday, but you essentially have to wake up an hour earlier than normal.

--You know baseball is a terribly run sport when for the first time in my lifetime, DC has a team and I still don't care (since they have no chance to make the playoffs). Also, congratulations to Alex Sanchez for officially becoming a historical footnote.

--Speaking of terribly run sports, does anyone outside of Canada, Detroit, and Colorado even miss hockey?

--I think Right Said Fred was right. He is too sexy for his cat.